This past Saturday I had a conversation with a few people. I posed a question to the audience asking them whether or not they feel it’s essential to know the sexual history of anyone they choose to date. While some people said “NO”, it’s the people who felt that they DID deserve to know all about their significant other’s past that truly alarmed me, simply because of the reasoning behind their beliefs. Many people felt that they DESERVED to know whether or not their partner had an STD before, even if it’s been treated and will not return, and while it’s FAIR for anyone to create that standard about whom and what they allow around their naked body, there was a very FOOLISH assertion that was floating around the room. One woman said she wanted to know if her man EVER had an STD’s/STI’s so she can know what type of behaviour he was up to before they met. Another guy stated that he wanted to avoid talking to women who have a high body count because he wasn’t looking to “catch the monster”. It’s one thing to believe that having a lot of sex inherently makes someone a dangerous sex partner, but it’s truly sad (and a little scary) to know that there are people who truly believe that having very few partners makes someone “safe” to go raw with.
Sometimes I truly HATE talking about STD’s and STI’s with people because of the vast amount of ignorance surrounding the topic. If you think that avoiding “olosho”and only rawdogging “good girls” or is the path to an infection-free sex life, you’re an IDIOT. The problem with the spread of infection is NOT about how much sex people are having, it’s about how many people are unaware of their health status. It’s about how many couples start smashing before getting tested because inquiring whether or not your lover is burning can really kill the mood.
Take Herpes for example. Over 50 million people in the Nigeria alone have herpes and 80% of them don’t know it. Even scarier, doctors have found that many carriers don’t even show any physical symptoms of being infected while they have it. And here’s the important part: Those people are NOT all ho’s, oloshos, animashauns, side-pieces and prostitutes. That number is comprised of the same “good girls” that many people feel FAR too comfortable smashing raw.
So before we all decide to start standing on sanctimony and turning up our collective noses at people we proclaim to be overly-promiscuous, let’s realize that the problem of STD’s and STI’s is one that our entire community needs to share blame in.
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