If there’s one term I truly hate with a passion, it’s “wife-material”. The reason I find that term so damn annoying is because it’s rarely used as a personal measure of one’s taste, but more so as a wholly-encompassing set of attributes that ALL men are suppose to agree with as if we all share the same needs and wants.
Many times I’ve found myself in discussions with dudes saying “bruh, [insert celebrity woman’s name here] is straight-up WIFE material bruh!” And when I disagree with their assertion (mostly predicated on the fact that I don’t actually KNOW her), I’m greeted with the same bullshit responses about how I don’t know what “a real wifey” is, and how I’m gonna be alone until Jesus returns . I really believe that everyone has their own individual tastes of what they want in a significant other, but the one constant between us all as human beings is our desire for someone who can treat us with the love and respect we all want. That takes someone beautiful – but it’s NOT the type of beauty that 90% of us talk about, or even recognize in the people we go after.
The problem with the dudes I referred to earlier, as well as most men and women I interact with on a daily basis, is that so many of us have lost sight in what beauty REALLY means. Dudes are calling women “wife material” based on which chick has the nicest titties combo on Instagram, or which girl has the nicest ass or which woman has the prettiest face. Then you have dudes who feel like they are intellectually above just wanting a woman with a sexy-ass physique, who list their must-have qualities as shit like being able to cook, be a freak in bed, have a solid education, and be gainfully employed. Some dudes even add solid qualities like her having a sense of humour, being strong-minded and being intelligent. But the one quality very few men and women ever look for in a significant other is BEAUTY – and that’s not about raw physical attraction, basic character attributes or some corny-ass ideal of inner-sweetness, but finding someone with actual inner-beauty that changes you so deeply to your core, it naturally makes you actually want to be a better man.
Inner beauty is NOT about how friendly someone is, or how nice they are, or how they encourage you when you’re down. Inner-beauty is NOT something that’s necessarily shared with EVERYONE (i.e. calling Mother Teresa a “beautiful” person because of how she treated the masses), because the beauty I’m talking about is based on the quality of love that someone is willing to share with the person they care for. The truth is, most of us don’t even know how to RECOGNIZE beauty in someone else that goes beyond skin deep.
Now this is NOT an anti-superficial rant, because I will ALWAYS want an attractive woman and you CAN’T convince me that the world doesn’t have women who are amazing inside and out. But this is more about recognizing something that most of us SAY we want, but no one really knows how to look for. Instead of solely searching for someone who hopefully has an amalgam of various individual character traits, maybe we should look more closely in to whether or not they make US a better person.
Just a thought for the next time you start making lists about what you NEED your future wife to have.